Tuesday, September 3, 2013

I'm Not Impressed

      Indian marriages along with their intriguing ways of working out has also brought along some jerks out into open who use women like testing fields for their own self and family. My friend was engaged to one such man before he called off the wedding after the wedding cards and invites were printed. His reason was rather simple- 'You didn't impress me.'
  So, it didn't strike him when he probably read up her profile or heard about her through his associates that she might not be able to impress him? After several meetings before coming to a decision, he didn't apply his mind? Must have been my fault. I thought he was a mind reader alongside being a brilliant man who decided that the girl must forsake her ongoing doctorate studies from the most reputed institution in the city after the wedding but not anytime sooner because merely telling his friends that his fiancee is pursuing the same gives him a sense of cheap pride in his friends circle of poorly-educated-wives.

      It was decided that she couldn't pursue her higher studies abroad after they got married because he's done the same. Where would that put him? A rung lower in his male chauvinistic society and thus that idea was turned down. In my world, you fell right down into the deepest pit, buddy. (And then punctured the earth and fell right through it)

 I guess he must have thought one fine day after half a year that he needed some fun in life. It's just that who he decided to inflict it upon turned out to be a great lady. He wasn't impressed with her because she didn't dress according to his likes and didn't express farce concern over a pretending son's depression to her future mother-in-law. He wasn't impressed because she didn't do her hair the way he wanted to and what not.What doesn't impress him next? The name? My date of birth? How about a permanent change in the colour of the eyes because you can't stare into the independence and strength of it, oh great one?

  These sort of men and women sicken me. Starting from my gut, it pours out completely in a nauseating way. She didn't impress you? What is she, a machine that has no mind of its own but that which abides by whatever you say? I'm plainly appalled at the way certain people can consider a prospective partner let alone a woman.

In all cases, even if the mistake is on the groom's side, the girl is being blamed and called names. She is to put up with all the wrong sides to the situation and her family is visibly upset. The guy, you ask?
He's sitting abroad, stretching his feet on the table and wondering what he shall do next in all his 'open-mindedness' and 'easy going nature' as his profiles might state..Which brings up a question. Are women mere living beings that need to impress men? The reasons men 'reject' women are increasingly galling and so are those men who think themselves to be the epitome of perfection and character. A small slap in the face would be to know that they are nowhere near that that. It disgusts me that some people can be so shallow and without any valid reason for their actions that causes deep pain to another.
What makes men and their families take such crude moves? I am unable to grasp a concept bereft of logic or emotions.
Is it because one is gender-wise a man?
Well, every other way.such people prove not to be. (Humans even)
Source:Google images

Disclaimer : Not all men are jerks,but the one I have mentioned above...Ah, he is indeed one.

She is one of the nice girls I know who is very well educated, well-mannered and holistically a great woman. I may not know her as a very close friend of mine, but she being a close friend of someone else who is very close to me, I know her in decent form. Even our short meetings and phone conversations have always been pleasant and so, when I heard what the person had to go through, it shook me with anger. I thought that I should perhaps touch upon these happenings as it is not the first time that I am seeing it happen on a personal level. Frankly, it's the guy's loss and the girl's good luck. No one has to put up with a 'man' like this with a mind so manipulative and finicky. 


  1. This post made me angry and sad at the same time. Angry at the horrible, cheap male chauvinism! Sad that this state of affairs exists and has no signs of dying out! :( Great post!

    1. Thanks a lot Vishnu. And yes, mutual feelings. I can't digest my anger still.

  2. I agree, the girl is lucky to be out of a messy life! Well narrated

    1. Thanks a lot Sibi. You couldn't have gotten it any more correct. :)

  3. Tell your friend to thank her lucky stars that it ended before it all began. Imagine what spending te rest of her life to such an asshole would have been like? Any man who expects women to give up their dreams and life choices to stoke their ego are not worth getting upset over. Tell your friend to hang in there and be strong. There ARE decent men out there. I married one.

    1. I sure shall tell her that SS. I only wish that guy reads this somehow and realizes what a jerk he has been!

  4. Thanks to the guy who saved her life :)
    If he hadnt stopped the wedding it must have been a life long pain of living with him :(


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